Witty Professor - Part 2

1. courtesy: ya... Go Ahead Then..
2. On the case where uncle dies and leaves a farm in his will – “Uncle had willed a farm; she knew (about) the will… with the help of the lawyer she finished off the uncle”
3. “It seems like most of you are not aware what exercise we are discussing … is that so”
4. “Students here are such that if they were given a big answer sheet and a marketing question paper, they will start preparing Transaction Analysis table”
5. On students saying that they will prepare a Transaction Analysis table – “You need a big sheet now, you will use it as a mat … put your head and sleep on that … looks like that’s what you have done in the midterm”
6. “Once you become a manager you will say ‘get a Transaction Analysis sheet’ … the poor accountant will say ‘what is the Transaction Analysis table’ … you will say ‘how u don’t have a Transaction Analysis’. That will be the big change you bring about in the company … from now on you will have a Transaction Analysis table for everything”
7. Explaining the difference between fixed and variable costs – “Price of the book that you have is a variable cost and the little salary they give me is the fixed cost. They want to take maximum benefit of this fixed cost and kept adding more chairs in the class … it will not surprise me if they break the wall (at the end) and then the guys would need binoculars to see this side, what is exactly happening. They might add another vertical layer on top also ….
   It looks like fixed cost in this institute is really a fixed cost … It does not vary with capacity”
8. “Revenue is going at a lag of one year and expense goes with the current year. This is one more method you have invented. We will add this to the midterm list.”
9. If you are asked to write a mission statement for a company … you like this strategic statements … every quarter you write a strategic statement and still talk about long term goals.
10. On not able to recognize revenue completely due to writeoffs – Student – “Generally we assume that once we write an invoice we will get the revenue”… Prof- “I appreciate your positive attitude”
11. Student – “Sir your logic does not use the numbers” … Prof –“I have not used … I am ignorant, innocent … you use it … …. *pause*… give him the mike also”
12. On the method of entering revenue after making the product usable – “Making it usable … I am thinking if ### will recognize revenue ever”
13. Asking the description of the problem to students- Prof- “What next?”
    Student –“ 3 methods of calculation”
    Prof- “What Next?”
    Student – Questions
    Prof – “What Next?”
    Student – “Next Case”
    Prof- “Each of us is a very good case”
14. “We can admit students in 2nd term also. To clear 1st Term, U just need to buy a dictionary that mentions all the business terms … that’s all !! …Who knows that student who comes in 2nd term may perform better than all of us”
15. “Why worry about perishability of the goods, you should be worried about durability of the customer”