Monday, September 28, 2009

Re: toefl links

http://www.majortests.com/gre/

On Mon, Sep 28, 2009 at 12:40 PM, haynes george <haynes.mg@gmail.com> wrote:


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: haynes george <haynes.mg@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Oct 4, 2007 at 6:23 AM
Subject: toefl links
To: kiran.antony@yahoo.com


To get a quick view, click on "Skip to Next part " until you get to a section which says " Click to choose the answer conditions you would like to experience: "
Click on guidelines/samples.

iBT Speaking 1:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_speaking_1-pre.html

iBT Speaking 2:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_speaking_2-pre.html

iBT Speaking 3:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_speaking_3a.html

iBT Speaking 4:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_speaking_4a.html

iBT Speaking 5:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_speaking_5a.html

iBT Speaking 6:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_speaking_6a.html

iBT writing 1:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_writing_Intro.html

iBT writing 2:
http://www.onlinenglish.net/iBT/OnlinEnglish_Actual/200703_writing_2a.html

another link .. could be used to find out possible questions for speaking question 1
http://iteslj.org/questions/

Another list that i got ( forgot the source though )

1. Your favourite pet

2. Your dressing style

3. What do you do in your free time? (Your most favourite hobby)

4. How do you learn English?

5. Which sport do you like best?

6. Which dish do you like best?

7. Your most favourite/important subject

8. You future plan

9. Your best scholastic achievement

10. What kind of music do you like best?

11. What do you expect in your parents?
   
12. If you had a wish, what would you wish?

13. If you can change one thing in your university, what would you change?

14. Your best friend

15. The person you like best

16. Your unforgettable day

17. What is unforgettable in your school life?

18. Your idea of a happy life

19. A type of book you enjoy reading

20. The fruit you like to eat most

21. Your favourite TV show

22. The movie you like best

23. The place you would like to visit

24. The strangest dream you have had

25. What would you do if you suddenly had a lot of money?

26. Your first attempt to gain something

27. Your ideal holiday resort

28. Your ambition

29. Your most influential person/teacher, and explain why you feel this person is a positive role model.

30. Where will you be professionally be in ten/15/20 years time?

31. What quality do you like best in a friend?

32. What do you treasure most in life?

33. What are the qualities of a good citizen?

34. Your favourite time of the year?

35. Your favourite colour?

36. What are the qualities of a good teacher?

37. What are the qualities of a good student?

38. What are the qualities of a good parent?

40. If you could change one thing in your country, what would you change?

41. The most inspiring person to you

42. Describe a job that you've had, and explain why it was important.

43. Describe a person you admire and explain why you admire him or her.

44. If you could have any job in the world, which job would you choose?

45. Describe a book that you have read and explain why it was important to you.

46. Describe a house that you live in

47. If you had an entire month to do whatever you would like to do, what would it be? Include details and example to support your selection

48. What are the characteristics of a good neighbour?

49. Which person has helped you the most to get where you are today, and how has he or she helped you?

50. What does your dream house look like?

51. What person who is alive today would you most like to meet?

52. Why are you preparing for the TOEFL test?

53. At what age should a person be allowed to drive?

54. What is the best excuse to give your teacher when you have not done your homework?

55. What is your favourite day of the year?

56. What change would you like the government to make?

57. ideal partner

58. priced possession

   
haynes




Thursday, September 24, 2009

Short story with a Moral ( Very Important )



http://interestingfunnyjokes.blogspot.com

U are in A Helicopter


A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position and course to fly to the airport.

The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, drew a handwritten sign, and held it in the helicopter's window. The pilot's sign said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters.



People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign read:

"YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER."

The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely.

After they were on the ground, the co-pilot asked the pilot how the "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER" sign helped determine their position.

The pilot responded "I knew that had to be the MICROSOFT building because they gave me a technically correct, but completely useless answer."


A Short Story!

 

A Short Story! [i am touched..]

A man was polishing his new car; his 4 yr old son picked up a stone & Scratched on the side of the car.

In anger, the furious Man took his child's hand & hit it many times, not realizing he was using a wrench.At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures.When the child saw his father....with painful eyes he asked 'Dad when will my fingers grow back?'

The man was so hurt and speechless.He went back to the car and kicked it many times. Devastated by his own actions... sitting in front of the car helooked at the scratches.
His son had written 'LOVE YOU DAD'. The next day that man committed suicide...

Anger and Love both have no limits...

Thing to remember.....
"Car, mobile and all other things are to be used. People are to be loved"

But the problem in today's world is.....
"People are being USED & "Things are being LOVED!!"


 

 



Tuesday, September 22, 2009

"I have seen god, he bats at no.4 for India"

Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar, the name speaks for itself. The person who makes me wonder at times whether Don Bradman was really better, or would I have liked Don more if I watched him play. My words might seem untrue to some, but he is my God, and you better listen what few other common people have to say about him

· Nothing bad can happen to us if we're on a plane in India with Sachin Tendulkar on it."

- Hashim Amla, the South African batsman, reassures himself as he boards a flight.

· "Sometimes you get so engrossed in watching batsmen like Rahul Dravid and Sachin Tendulkar that you lose focus on your job."

- Yaseer Hameed in pakistani newspaper.

· "To Sachin, the man we all want to be"

- Andrew Symonds wrote on an aussie t-shirt he autographed specially
for Sachin.


· "Beneath the helmet, under that unruly curly hair, inside the
cranium, there is something we don't know, something beyond
scientific measure.
Something that allows him to soar, to roam a territory of sport that,
forget us, even those who are gifted enough to play alongside him
cannot even fathom. When he goes out to bat, people switch on their TV
sets and switch off their lives."

- BBC on Sachin


· "Tuzhe pata hai tune kiska catch chhoda hai?"

- Wasim Akram to Abdul Razzaq when the latter dropped Sachin's catch in
2003 WC.


· Sachin is a genius. I'm a mere mortal.

- Brian Charles Lara

· "We did not lose to a team called India...we lost to a man called
Sachin."

- Mark Taylor, during the test match in Chennai (1997)


· "The more I see of him the more confused I'm getting to which is his
best knock."

- M. L. Jaisimha


· "The joy he brings to the millions of his countrymen, the grace with
which he handles all the adulation and the expectations and his innate
humility - all make for a one-in-a-billion individual,"

- Glen McGrath

· "I can be hundred per cent sure that Sachin will not play for a minute
longer when he is not enjoying himself. He is still so eager to go out
there and play. He will play as long as he feels he can play,"

- Anjali Tendulkar



· "Even my father's name is Sachin Tendulkar."

- Tendulkar's daughter, Sara, tells her class her father's name after
the teacher informs them of a restaurant of the same name in Mumbai.


· Question: Who do you think as most important celebrity?

Shah Rukh Khan: There was a big party where stars from bollywood and
cricket were invited. Suddenly, there was a big noise, all wanted to
see approaching Amitabh Bachhan. Then Sachin entered the hall and
Amitabh was leading the queue to get a grab of the GENIUS!!
- Shah Rukh Khan in an interview.

· "India me aap PrimeMinister ko ek Baar Katghare me khada kar sakte
hain..Par Sachin Tendulkar par Ungli nahi utha Sakte.. "

- Navjot Singh Sidhu on TV

· He can play that leg glance with a walking stick also.

- Waqar Younis

· 'I Will See God When I Die But Till Then I Will See Sachin'
- A banner in Sharjah


· Sachin Tendulkar has often reminded me of a veteran army colonel
who has many medals on his chest to show how he has conquered
bowlers all over the world. I was bowling
to Sachin and he hit me for
two fours in a row. One from point and the other in between point and
gully. That was the last two balls of the over and the over after that
we (SA) took a wicket and during the group meeting i told Jonty
(Rhodes) to be alert and i know a way to pin Sachin. And i delivered
the first ball of my next over and it was a fuller length delevery
outside offstump. And i shouted catch. To my
astonishment the ball was hit to the cover boundary. Such was the
brilliance of Sachin. His reflex time is the best i have ever seen.
Its like 1/20th of a sec. To get his wicket better not prepare.
Atleast u wont regret if he hits you for boundaries.

- Allan Donald


· On a train from Shimla to Delhi, there was a halt in one of the
stations. The train stopped by for few minutes as usual. Sachin was
nearing century, batting on 98. The passengers, railway officials,
everyone on the train waited for Sachin to complete the century. This
Genius can stop time in India!!

- Peter Rebouck - Aussie journalist


· "Sachin cannot cheat. He is to cricket what (Mahatma) Gandhiji was to
politics. It's clear discrimination. "
- NKP Salve, former Union Minister when Sachin was accused of ball
tempering


· There are 2 kind of batsmen in the world. One Sachin Tendulkar. Two
all the others.

- Andy Flower


· "I have seen god, he bats at no.4 for India"

- Mathew Hayden

"God bats at No.4 for India" - Hayden

That's How Maths is Done :D



Marketing!!!!!!!



 
 A guy was playing golf one day and he got lost. He saw a lady up
ahead of
him and went to her and said, "Can you please help me, I don't
know  what
hole I'm on." She told him "You are one hole behind me. I'm on
7;  you're on
6". He thanked her and continued playing golf.
Later he got lost again. He saw the same lady and  went to her
again kind of
embarrassed. "I'm sorry to bother you again but  I'm lost again,
can you
please tell me what hole I'm on." She told him "you are one hole
behind me.
I'm on 14; you are on 13." Again he thanked her and continued
playing golf.

When he finished he saw her in the clubhouse. He went upto her
and asked if
he could buy her a drink for helping him out. She accepted. As
they  were
drinking and talking he asked her what she did for a living.
"I'm  in
sales." He replied, "no kidding so am I. What do  you sell?"

She said  it's too embarrassing to tell. But after he kept
pleading to know
what she sold she said she'd tell him if he promised not to
laugh. He
promised. she said, "I sell WHISPER (Sanitary Napkins)" . He
immediately
fell to the floor laughing hysterically.

She said, "You promised you wouldn't laugh". He replied, "I'm
sorry, but I
couldn't help it. I sell toilet paper........ I'm still one hole
behind
you." 
 


 
 


Sunday, September 20, 2009

Sultan of Brunei... too much





3 children are born every second in this world;
10 mobile phones sold on the international level;
auto manufacturers produce a car every 4.5 seconds on average;
and on the level of the human mind = brain cells send 200 directives each second  
to perform the various functions of physical and mental health.
The world spends 37 million euros for arms on the international level in one second  

 
 
And the Sultan of Brunei's wealth increases by 90 euros every second!

No envy please!

This means around 5400 euros per minute, 324000 euros each hour, 7776000 euros a day

Implies about 54432000 euros a week (that's 54 million and 432000 thousand euros)


 
cid:1.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
Brunei's Sultan Hassanal Bolkiah ... President of the richest country in the world
Popular, lavish, ... uses gold in everything
Was born literally eating with spoons made of gold
Clothes worn embroidered with gold and silver

These are some pictures of his palace ...

The largest and most luxurious palace in the world...
Consists of 1788 rooms with some furnished in gold and diamond-encrusted
257 bath inlaid with gold and silver
and a garage to accommodate 110 cars
The palace has 650 suites ... each furnished at not less than 150,000 thousand euros
This requires the visitor to spend 24 hours just to inspect each room for 30 seconds

 
 
cid:2.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:3.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
The Sultan of Brunei's plane

Most luxurious aircraft in the world, inlaid with gold
The Sultan has also a Boeing 747 worth a hundred million dollars,

and then re-designed as a home at a cost of more than one hundred and twenty million dollars.
Featured add-ons such as a whirlpool bath of pure gold
He also has six small aircraft and two helicopters.

 
 
cid:4.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
 
cid:5.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
 
cid:6.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:7.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
 
cid:8.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:9.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:10.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:11.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:12.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
One of the cars of theSultan of Brunei

At the special request of the Sultan of Brunei,

theRolls Royce company
combined their car designs with that of Porsche.
This vehicle is currently in London  
for use during his stay in Britain

cid:13.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:14.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
 
cid:15.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
When the Sultan of Brunei's daughter married,
the legendarycelebrations continued for 14 days,
at a cost of about five million dollars,
attended by more than 25 heads of state and family members.

 
 
cid:16.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:17.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
Sultan of Brunei car inlaid with pure gold
 
 
cid:18.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:19.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
cid:20.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
The Princess wears a crown of diamonds
and carries a small bouquet of flowers studded with diamonds.
She also wears huge diamonds as earrings, adding sparkle to her face.

cid:21.785731665@web58207.mail.re3.yahoo.com
 
 
Wikipediasays he has
531 Mercedes-Benzes  
367 Ferraris  
362 Bentleys
185 BMWs
177 Jaguars
160 Porsches  
130 Rolls-Royces
And 20 Lamborghinis

Bringing the total number of his cars to 1,932!

 

 

 


O.O.O.



 
The Best "Out-Of-Office" E-Mail Auto-Replies:



1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I
fail to get the position.



2: I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.



3: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of
the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received
anything at all.



4: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain
removed so that I may be promoted to management



5: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you
send me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and
your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.



6: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99
for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your
message.

 


(Best One)

7: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is
unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try
sending again.'


(The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many
in-duh-viduals did this over and over).



8: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing
system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a
reply in approximately 19 weeks.



9: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by
your PC for my response.



10: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother
to leave me any messages.



11: I've run away to join a different circus.



Ten Amazing Coincidences!!!







What's in a Name?


http://images.stanzapub.com/readers/2008/08/27/0_22.jpg


A computer error gave two women in America called Patricia the same social security number. When the two women were brought together in an office to rectify the blunder they discovered that
  • They had both been born with the names Patricia Ann Campbell
  • Both of their fathers were called Robert Campbell
  • Their birthdays were on 13th March 1941
  • They had both married military men in the year 1959 (within eleven days of each other)
  • They each had two children aged 19 and 21
  • They both had an interest in oil painting
  • Both had studied cosmetics
  • Both had worked as book-keepers



Bullet With Your Name on It


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/10c_bullet.jpg


In 1893, Henry Ziegland ended a relationship with his girlfriend.
Tragically, his girlfriend took the news very badly, became distraught and took her own life.
Her distressed brother blamed his sister's death upon Henry, he went round to Henry's house, saw him out in the garden and tried to shoot him.
Luckily, the bullet only grazed Henry's face and embedded itself in a nearby tree.
In 1913, twenty years after this incident, Henry decided to use dynamite to uproot a tree in his garden. The explosion propelled the embedded bullet from the tree straight into Henry Ziegland's head - killing him immediately.





Lucky Hughs?


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/10coin2.jpg


On December 5th 1660, a ship sank in the straights of Dover - the only survivor was noted to be Hugh Williams.
On 5th December 1767, another ship sank in the same waters - 127 lost their lives, the only survivor was noted to be Hugh Williams
On 8th August 1820, a picnic boat capsized on the Thames - there was one survivor - Hugh Williams.
On 10th July 1940, a British trawler was destroyed by a German mine - only two men survived, one man and his nephew - they were both called Hugh Williams.





With a Quack Quack Here


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/3_6.jpg


Mr McDonald was a farmer who lived in Canada - nothing extra-ordinary in that - until you learn that his postcode contained the letter sequence EIEIO.





'Til Death Did Them Part


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/5_6.jpg


In 1996, Paris police set out to investigate a late night, high speed car crash, both drivers had been killed instantly.
Investigations revealed that the deceased were in fact man and wife.
Police initially suspected some kind of murder or suicide pact but it became apparent that the pair had been separated for several months - neither could have known that the other would have been out driving that night - it was just a terrible coincidence.





She's Behind You!


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/6_5.jpg


Michael Dick had been travelling around the UK with his family to track down his daughter, Lisa - who he had lost contact with ten years earlier.
After a long fruitless search, he approached the Suffolk Free Press, who agreed to help him by putting an appeal in their newspaper.
Fortunately, his long lost daughter saw the appeal and the pair were reunited. The odd thing was, his daughter had been right behind him when the free paper took the photograph - shown in the photograph above. What are the chances of that!





Licensed To Thrill


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/7_5.jpg


 
A fifteen year old pupil at Argoed High School in North Wales was to sit his GCSE examinations in 1990.
His name was James Bond - his examination paper reference was 007.





What Goes Around….


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/297297_1.jpg


In 1965, at the age of four, Roger Lausier was swimming off a beach in Salem - he got into difficulties and was saved from drowning by a woman called Alice Blaise.
In 1974, on the same beach, Roger was out on a raft when he pulled a drowning man from the water - amazingly, the man he saved was Alice Blaise's husband.





Lightning Never Strikes Twice?


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/10coin3.jpg


British cavalry officer Major Summerford was fighting in the fields of Flanders in the last year of WW1, a flash of lightning knocked him off his horse and paralysed him from his waist down.

He moved to Vancouver, Canada, six years later, whilst out fishing, Major Summerfield was struck by lightning again and the right side of his body became paralysed.
After two years of recovery, it was a summers day and he was out in a local park, a summer storm blew up and Major Summerfield was struck by lightning again - permanently paralysing him.
He died two years after this incident.
However, four years after his death, his stone tomb was destroyed - it was struck by lightning!





Practice What You Preach


http://www.world-mysteries.com/newgw/297297_3.jpg


Businessman Danie de Toit made a speech to an audience in South Africa - the topic of his speech was - watch out because death can strike you down at any time.

At the end of his speech, he put a peppermint in his mouth, and choked to death on it!



Thursday, September 17, 2009

Spot the hidden tiger!!!


PRICELESS WORDS

PRICELESS WORDS

A husband wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the table, I left early to go grocery shopping. Love You!"

Totally shocked with the note , he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. He asks, "Son, what happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some crockery, puked in the hall, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door". Confused, the man asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!"
His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said,


"LADY LEAVE ME ALONE! I'M MARRIED!"

Moral -
Self-induced hangover - $ 400.00
Broken crockery - $ 800.00
Breakfast - $ 10.00
Saying the Right Thing While Drunk - "PRICELESS "

There are truly some things that both Money and Mastercard can't buy..


STUMPER


 

STUMPER
I am sending this only to my smart friends.. I could not figure
it out and had to look at the answer. See if you can figure
out what these words have in common...... ....
1 Banana
2 Dresser
3 Grammar
4 Potato
5 Revive
6 Uneven
7 Assess


Are you peeking or have you already given up? Give it
another try. Look at each word carefully. (You'll kick
yourself when you discover the answer..)
This Is Cool.....
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Answer:
No, it is not that they all have at least 2 double letters.
(Thought I had the answer, but I did not go far enough.)

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Answer:
In all of the words listed, if you take the first letter, place it at the end of the word, and then spell the word backwards, it will be the same word. Did you figure it out? Just send it to more people and stump them...

 

 

 

 




Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Marketing Concepts in just 2 minutes

Marketing Concepts in just 2 minutes


Arrested for laughing




Arrested for laughing

Arrested for laughing! This is from an actual trial in the UK :

A young woman several months pregnant boarded a bus.

She noticed a young  man smiling at her. She began feeling humiliated on
account of her condition.
She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then
on
her third move he burst out laughing..................She had him
arrested.

When the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted
in
such a manner. His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't
help
noticing she was pregnant. She first sat under an advertisement, which
read:
'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins'.

I was even more amused when she changed her seat and went to sit under a

shaving advertisement, which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick'.

Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat

under an advertisement, which read: 'Dunlop Rubber would have prevented

this accident.'

The case was dismissed.........!!!
:D




Men Vs Women - Humour







The Silent Treatment...



A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
other the silent treatment.


Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM '


He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight.


Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
the bed.


The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.



WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'

'Yep,' the wife replied , 'in-laws''


WOMEN'S REVENGE..

'Cash, cheque or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

'So, do you always carry your TV remote?'
I asked.

'No,' she replied, ' but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'

W O R D S..

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'


CREATION..

A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.

' The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.

God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me.

God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !!!


WHO DOES WHAT..

A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, 'You should do it, because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.'


The husband said, ' You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'

Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible
that the man should do the coffee.'

Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says..........'HEBREWS'


God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece..





SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH
AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!!!

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Monday, September 14, 2009

Seasonal Views of the Great Wall of China...Worth watching

now that's a wonder!

15 of the Strongest Alcoholic Drinks



 

Get Drunk Faster: 15 of the Strongest Alcoholic Drinks

Sep 1st 2009

Montage

In every country, as we speak, people are drinking alcohol in order to intoxicate themselves. Certain types of liquor are notorious for the way they affect the drinker. Brandy has a reputation for inducing painful hangovers, while specific liquors, such as Jagermeister, are known as digestives liquor and are meant to be consumed after meals to aid digestion. However, some of the most famous types of liquor are known primarily for their extremely high alcohol content. Some of the world's strongest alcohols are chemically engineered and produced to severely alter your state of consciousness.

Nihonshu a.k.a. Sake

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Sake is Japanese liquor produced from rice, water, and mold. This alcoholic beverage was first documented in 712 A.D. as it was found in the Kojiki, or Japan's first written history. Sake is unique because of its multiple parallel fermentation process. This is where starch is converted to sugar, and sugar into alcohol by way of yeast simultaneously; whereas many other alcohols complete one process at a time. While Japanese demand for sake decreases, the worldwide popularity and demand for sake increases. Sake is almost always 30-40 proof, and since alcohol content is exactly half the proof, sake weighs in at 15-20% alcohol per volume.

Southern Comfort

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The recipe to this U.S. neutral grain spirit liqueur is one of grandeur. Beginning with quality bourbon, add one inch vanilla bean, a quarter of lemon, half a cinnamon stick, four cloves, a few cherries and an orange slice. Let ingredients sit for several days and finish with a touch of honey. This fruit spiced whiskey flavored alcohol is a favorite among college campuses across the United States. The alcohol per volume in Southern Comfort ranges from 21-50% making it a versatile crowd pleaser.

Mescal

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All of you who have eaten the worm are familiar with Mescal. Produced only from agave plants in Oaxaca, Mexico, this alcohol must meet strict guidelines in order to be mescal. Earth ovens are used in the early processes of cooking down the hearts of the agave plant to produce the liquor. Three classifications of mescal are produced: Anejo, Reposado, and Joven. This liquor is consumed heavily by U.S. tourists while in Mexico, and as for the worm – its name is Hypopta Agavis. Known as the Maguey worm, this species is commonly found on agave plants. The alcohol content of mescal is between 35-40%, rivaling its sister liquor tequila.

Arrack

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The word arrack is derived from the Arabic word arak, which translates to "sweet" or "strong liquor." Those who drink arrack commonly agree that the taste is that of a whiskey-rum blend. Distilled from fermented fruits, grain, sugar cane, and the sap of coconut palms arrack is most popular in Sri Lanka, Indonesia, and the Philippines. The proof of arrack differs with each recipe; therefore, the alcohol content varies from 33-50%. Arrack is commonly used in cocktails, and can compliment other beverages such as orange juice and cola.

Vodka

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Vodka is without question the most popular spirit in the liquor market today. We're sure you already knew this and have some fuzzy memories of your own experiences with it. This alcohol has low levels of congeners, or impurities, which minimizes the damage of a hangover. For the same reason, vodka is the most versatile liquor when mixing into cocktails. All this can be attributed to vodka being distilled anywhere from 3-7 times before bottling. Created in the grain harvesting areas of Western Russia, Belarus, Lithuania, Ukraine and Poland, the ingredients of vodka are rye or wheat, potatoes, and sugar beet molasses. The alcohol content of vodka varies between 35-50%.

Tequila

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This spirit is produced from only the blue agave plant grown in the Jalisco regions of Guanajuato, Michoacán, Nayarit, and Tamaulipas. The restrictions upon tequila instructions are linked to the volcanic soil which provides perfect conditions for blue agave growth. Tequila is indeed special liquor, but contrary to popular belief it does not contain any hallucinogenic properties, it's just a real sloppy drunk. Tequila has five categories including Blanco, Joven, Reposado, Anejo, and Extra Anejo. The difference being age and casking techniques, which can be seen in the hue of tequila going from clear, yellow, amber, and dark brown. Tequila proof is measured between 70 and 110 giving this liquor an alcohol content of 35-55%.

Gin

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Presently, most gin is distilled, produced, and consumed in Europe, the majority of that in the United Kingdom. White grain flavored with juniper berries is distilled at the beginning of the the process. Once done, the grain is distilled again with other botanicals such as anise, angelica root, coriander, saffron and licorice root. The consensus among the majority of folks is that gin smells like pine trees and tastes like rubbing alcohol. This spirit certainly has a reputation, but as a medicinal alcohol not many spirits can match its usefulness. The alcohol content of gin is 40-50% as its potency matches its complexity.

Brandy

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Brandy is enjoyed in its own special glass called a snifter. Regarded as luxury liquor, this eaux-de-vie has an alcohol content between 36-60%. Brandy is best known for being after dinner drink due to its uncompromising smoothness. The word brandy is derived from the Dutch word brandewijn which translates to "burnt wine." There are three classifications of brandy: grape, fruit, or pomace. Many of the famous brandies hail from the Cognac region of France such as Courvoisier, Remy Martin, and Hennessy. As delicious as brandy may be, congeners in this alcohol are considerably higher than other spirits therefore resulting in quite the hangover the morning after.

Wild Turkey

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This bourbon whiskey is produced near Lawrenceburg, Kentucky and has an alcohol content ranging from 40-54%. Wild Turkey is nicknamed the "Dirty Bird," as its reputation proceeds itself as strong liquor. The ingredients used to make Wild Turkey come from across the nation, the barley coming from Montana, the corn from Kentucky and Indiana and the rye coming mostly from North Dakota. In 1995, Wild Turkey released its 101 proof label available only in the United States. Standard bourbons are 80 proof, giving a slight edge to the Turkey for being one of the strongest liquors in its class.

American Whiskey

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We discussed Wild Turkey, and it's technically an American whiskey, so why didn't we group it together with these whiskies? The reason is due to the standard proof of many bourbons being 80, but can reach as high as 120. All bourbon whiskies are aged in charred oak barrels to achieve the flavor and appearance they possess. There are four distinct types of whiskey: single malt, vatted malt, blended grain, and single grain. Evidence suggests that distillation was brought from the Mediterranean region back to the British Isles in the 6th and 7th centuries. Famous brands of bourbon whiskey include Jack Daniels, Evan Williams and Jim Beam.

Scotch Whisky

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Just as with bourbon whiskey, there are four distinct categories for Scotch whisky. You may have noticed the different spelling: Americans and the Irish spell whiskey with an e, and the Scots spell whisky without an e, just to be difficult. Scotch whisky is one of the slowest aging liquors, as well as one of the most expensive when acquiring rare years. There are six Scotch producing regions in Scotland: Islands, Islay, Campbeltown, Lowland, Highland, and Speyside. Scotch whisky has an identical proof to its American counterparts ranging from 80-136, giving Scotch an alcohol content of 40-68%.

Absinthe

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Absinthe is among the world's most potent and intoxicating liquors. It's nicknamed "la fee verte" and better known as the Green fairy. Absinthe's alcohol content ranges from 45-68% and is traditionally green, but can be colorless. Absinthe is anise flavored, and the active chemical thujone can be found in the main ingredient, Artemisia Absinthium, a.k.a. Grande wormwood. Absinthe has been illegal in the United States since 1915 because of its alleged psychoactive effects upon consumers. Absinthe is enjoyed by slowly trickling ice cold water onto a sugar cube placed atop a special spoon that allows the water and sugar to dissolve equally into the absinthe.

Bacardi 151

151

Have you ever been to a party where a watermelon has been cored and soaked in alcohol? If you have, chances are you are familiar with Bacardi 151. The name stems from the proof of the rum, which is 151 providing for an alcohol content of 75.5%. This over-proof rum is used mainly for cocktails, and the infamous "pj" or party juice. Bacardi is the only brand that installs a flame arrester on the bottle due to the high volatility of the alcohol. Popular flaming drinks, such as the B-52, require Bacardi 151 to concoct.

Grain Alcohol

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Due to the extreme alcohol content of 95% grain alcohol, it is illegal to purchase in California, Florida, New York, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Hawaii, Michigan, Nevada, and Virginia. This liquor is a neutral grain spirit which is relatively low in impurities, which you've learned by now, minimizes the effects of what we all know to be a hangover. Grain alcohol has an ugly reputation on college campuses everywhere due to the ease in which alcohol poisoning can occur while consuming it. This spirit has nearly tripled the potency of most alcohols, but finds itself within the same price range. Grain alcohol is without a doubt the strongest spirit available for retail purchase.

Moonshine

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At the top of the mountain rests the heavyweight champion of all liquors. Moonshine is produced in unlicensed stills, registers a perfect 100% alcohol content, and can be found in more than 60 countries. Moonshine, hooch, or white lightning can be made from corn meal, sugar, yeast, and water. There are two different types of still that are used to produce moonshine, a still pot and a reflux still. The still pot is more commonly used among shiners for its simplicity and mobility. The reflux still is capable of producing finer quality hooch at faster rates but sacrifices mobility. "Lead burns red and makes you dead" is a famous adage concerning the lead contents of moonshine and how when set ablaze turns red. Moonshine can be flavored with any fruit, and even birch bark to give the hooch a minty flavor.

So, What'll You Have?

Pick your poison carefully because each type of alcohol will produce a different kind of drunk. Vodka and Tequila are known for sloppy, loose drunkenness. Scotch whisky and bourbons are known for chest-warming heavy-headed buzzes. Rum, brandy, and specifically cognacs are associated with extremely painful hangovers. Alcohol reacts differently to all individuals in regard to their body chemistry. Across the world in many countries friends, family, and acquaintances have been getting hammered the whole time you were reading this article. In an attempt to catch up with them, we'd suggest Long Island Iced Tea.